Get Him Involved in Wedding Planning

Yesterday we talked about why men don't tend to be as prone to be involved in wedding planning as women. That's important, if only for our own sanity.

But knowing why men tend to avoid the wedding planning process doesn't help unless we have a strategy for finding a way to recruit their assistance on what is, in most cases, the largest party you will every throw in your life.

Today's tip: Find something that he is interested in that can play a part in your wedding.

This will take a little bit of thought as you take time to consider his interests and skills. It is worth while after all. We are all different with different skills so finding the right fit might take some creativity. Because of that here are a couple suggestions that might help:

• Wedding Websites: Men are famous for loving their high tech toys. If yours is one of them then having them set up a wedding website could take a huge weight off your shoulders since the website can take care of the vast majority of all of your responsibilities to communicate with your guests. Think, maps. Thinks, hotel options for your out of town guests. Think a regular blog to keep your guests up to date on the developments of your wedding. Think videos. Think electronic RSVP and RSVP storage. The list goes on of tasks many men would be comfortable with and thereby willing (or even eager) to take on.
• Physical Preparations: Are there items to be built for your wedding or reception? Are you planning to buy an archway to disguise the ugly door to the wedding? Does he dabble in some kind of craftsmanship or art that you could incorporate into your decor for your reception? - On a personal note my father made unique vases for my wedding, and people still talk about our distinctive table centerpieces as a result - Are you looking for a way to put a gazebo on your parent's estate for the ceremony. Perhaps your groom could build it. It gets him involved, makes your wedding event more personal, is generally cheaper than purchasing, give you a keepsake of your big day, and most of all it tells him (in a way that he can hear) that his input in his wedding is indeed welcome.

As a general rule, while you can and probably should ask his opinion on flowers and color schemes, don't push in these areas. There is a real good chance he doesn't have enough interest in those areas to have an opinion and pushing will just make him feel unappreciated. Instead find areas that he does have interest and skill in. This will help him to feel appreciated and welcome in the wedding planning process and this will have benefits in building your marriage instead of just your wedding!