Traditions and Wedding Planning

Don't confuse wedding tradtions with wedding planning. Simply going out and collecting all the same items as everyone else has in their wedding is not the same as planning a wedding. It's following the crowd.

Sure, in many cases traditions are followed because they reflect the individual's heritage - either cultural or religious. That is fine. Not only is there nothing wrong with that, but embracing one's heritage is too be applauded.

However, most brides that ONLY follow tradition have not stopped to really consider what makes them unique - and everyone is special in some way.

The wedding planning process is the time that every couple has to take who they are and express it in a celebration of what they value. That includes their traditions, but it also includes the ways in which God has made each of them unique and special.

So instead of letting yourself fall into the trap of settling for a cookie cutter wedding, take a day, grab your favorite hot drink and a note pad, consider what makes you unique and what is important to you as a couple. After you do, take a few more minutes and sketch out a few ideas for how you can make your wedding personal.

By the way, it might help to scan our fun wedding ideas directory to help get the creative juices flowing.

How Do Wedding Traditions Fit With Good Wedding Planning?

Wedding fun often means looking for new and inventive ways of doing our wedding ceremony - but that is not the definition of creating a fun and meaningful wedding. Rather, if I were to create such a definition it would go something like this:

Good wedding planning means thinking carefully about every detail in the wedding and using what best reflects you as a couple and your values.

That's it. Simple and succinct. Think about everything and use that which reflects you. Don't be tied to, "I have to... because that's the way it's done."

That sounds like a rejection of wedding traditions. But it's not. Not by a long shot. Wedding traditions have a huge place in the modern wedding.

Everything that we now consider wedding tradition grew out of either need or symbolism and either can now have a real and meaningful symbolic role in a modern wedding ceremony.

For example, the positioning of the bride on the left hand side of the groom grew from ancient Anglo-Saxon days when it was common for opposing factions to attempt to kidnap the bride. Placing her on the grooms left hand side left his sword hand free to protect her.

By the way, this is also where the tradition of the Best Man came from - as it was originally the grooms most trusted ally who would stand beside him in defense of the bride.

On the surface it's easy to look at that and dismiss it as not relevant to today's wedding practice. After all, not many brides today are kidnapped on their wedding day and most grooms do not wear a sword - nor would it do much good against today's weapons.

But... Do you feel safe in his company? Do you want the whole world to know that you trust this man with your life? Then perhaps you should stand on his left side. Perhaps you even want to have some fun with the idea and stage an (obviously fake) kidnapping attempt. Maybe not. But at least you will know why you are standing where you are and that will make the ceremony more meaningful to both of you.

Check out world wedding traditions. It's interesting reading. You'll be amazed by the similarities in the wedding traditions and marriage customs of people from all over the world.

At the same time each nationality of people seems to have their own little way to go about the union of a man and woman too. The one thing that all wedding ceremonies seem to have in common is the hope of a productive and happy union between the wedding couple. Wedding traditions developed as signs of this hope for ultimate happiness for the new couple.